It’s Witchcraft / August 22 2007
So I went to buy my hairdye this morning and could not believe my eyes when I was in the shop.
Since my last trip there, and my discussion with the elderly assistant over the disproportionate price difference between the male- and female-intended products, the cost of said items has vastly increased.
Just For Men, which previously [...]
Poodles in China / August 15 2007
I have just been asked by Mary, my elderly next-door-neighbour to help her fix a problem she was having with her plumbing. ‘No problem,’ I said, happy to oblige.
I was amazed, however – no, shocked is a better word – when I saw for the first time her collection of porcelain dogs. She has got [...]
In Golden Pond / July 18 2007
I know this might sound like a gross generalisation, but all old people are useless.
I was just in the small chemist’s shop in the village attempting to buy some brown hair-dye. On inspecting the packets on the shelves, I noticed that whilst the various Belle Colours and Garniers with pictures of smiling, handsome young women on the [...]
A Streetcar Named Retire / June 18 2007
There is a generally held opinion in this country that elderly drivers should be required to re-take their driving tests once they reach a certain age. I would go further and ban them entirely.
One doddering old codger nearly ran over me and Audrey this morning as we were enjoying our early walk. He looked about [...]
Man Down! Medic! / May 27 2007
I am too old now to do such things, but I have actually just fallen over outside. It was spectacular but not very funny. I have hurt my back and badly dented my pride. Boo hoo.
During our morning walk on the rec, a football belonging to a group of young boys rolled towards my dog [...]
Wake Me Up Before I Go Go / March 28 2007
I know that growing old is inevitable, but for me, lately, the process has taken a somewhat unexpected turn.
For perhaps the last eight months or so, I find I am waking up two or three times in the night desperately needing to pee. Even if I try not to ingest much liquid in the hours before [...]
