Red Spaniels and Musclemen / September 29 2008
‘Good morning. Lovely day isn’t it.’
Damn, I thought. Damn! Damn! Damn!
When Audrey and I passed the frisky red spaniel this morning he was accompanied by an incredibly huge and rather frightening young man with a cleft chin and slicked-back hair. As they passed by I was tempted to form the immediate assumption that the proliferation of tattoos covering the man’s forearms was to make up for the fact that he did not have a neck.
He had on a tiny black t-shirt with the letters FBI on the back in white; it was so tight on him that it looked as if it were meant for a child: perhaps, on a recent holiday to America, he had stolen it from an adolescent, trainee federal agent.
His limbs bulged as if they were about to burst. I was so taken aback I think I actually broke wind. ‘Is there a circus in town?’ I whispered to Audrey when he was out of earshot.
On returning to the house I took a minute to sit down and clear my head before starting work. I had made myself a milky coffee and watched a programme on the television about clowns.
Filed under Clowns / Life / Other People
Comments
3 comments on “Red Spaniels and Musclemen”
Nelson Galaxy / September 29th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Don’t try and make him angry Napoleon, he will crush your skull like an egg.
Matthew Dryden / September 29th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Lame.
(That’s seriously the only thought that came to my head.)
Napoleon Fantastic / September 30th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Thanks for the vote of confidence, Nelson.
Matthew,
I’m sure I can win her over with my charming wit.
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