David Duchovny Ate My Hamster / July 31 2008
We are supposed to enjoy something of a temperate climate here in the UK but it is becoming more and more extreme.
It is so cold around here in the winter that rainbows freeze to the ground; poor kids chip off pieces of their favourite colours for a Christmas treat and lick them until they’re white. And this summer is so hot! Yesterday Audrey and I saw a squirrel in a tree fanning his nuts, and this morning she chased a cat and they were both walking.
The nights are horrible at the moment, oppressive and muggy and not at all suitable for sleeping. The present conditions are perfect for fitful nights of dreaming weird dreams, however. Last night, I spent a few hours with David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson.
Duchovny was being very annoying, trying to impress Gillian with his jolly japes – at one point he found a hamster in my Claris Cliff teapot and swallowed it whole, it might have been rather horrific but it was just embarrassing – but Gillian was very sweet. Somewhere in there, she said to me, ‘Every day in every way, you’re getting better and better,’ which I found very encouraging and made me want to have sexual congress with her.
The dream ended with them both holding hands and repeating some bizarre mantra – probably Californian – which sounded something like: ‘Thgir si ger, thgir si ger.’ I have no idea what it means.
Filed under Aliens / Animals / Audrey / British Weather / Dreams / X-Files
Comments
2 comments on “David Duchovny Ate My Hamster”
Nelson Galaxy / July 31st, 2008 at 2:44 pm
You need to get yourself an air-conditioning unit - stop the wierd dreams. And less of the midnight cheese feasts. Thgir si ger, thgir si ger.
Napoleon Fantastic / August 1st, 2008 at 11:14 am
No cheese, Nelson - it’s just my active mind.
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