Kylie Bombshell / July 4 2008
‘What do you reckon about that Kylie Mine-agog getting the OBE, then, eh?’ I was collared in the street this morning by the moronic fellow from number 16 who loves to share the sound of his car alarm with the neighbourhood. ‘She only got it ‘cos Prince Charles fancies her.’
I humoured him: ‘The whole affair invites speculation to some extent, doesn’t it.’ For once, I tried to make my point with a measured neutrality.
‘Makes me bloody sick,’ he opined, spittle foaming white in the corners of his mouth. ‘All these honest people like you and me grafting day after day with no thanks, and who gets honoured? Eh? Who?’ - I was worried for a moment that he was about to have an epileptic fit - ‘Some bloody Aussie tart who can’t sing – that’s who!’
My only thoughts were of escape. ‘Ha ha, yes. I would love to stand and chat but I must deliver myself of your leave. I need to lie down – I’m afraid I might be about to have a brain aneurism.’
‘Never mind – Star Trek’s on t’telly later,’ he helpfully informed me, suddenly full of joy.
This is what I said in reply: ‘That’s great.’ This is what I was actually thinking: ‘Beam me up, Scotty.’
Filed under Kylie / Prince Charles / Star Trek / English Village Life / Neighbours from Hell / Idiots
Comments
4 comments on “Kylie Bombshell”
Nelson Galaxy / July 4th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
I was suprised to discover that Kylie is only 2 foot 9. I still would though.
Napoleon Fantastic / July 4th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Would what, Nelson?
Nelson Galaxy / July 7th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Give her a special gift.
Napoleon Fantastic / July 7th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
Hmm . . .
You old romantic, Nelson.
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