Telling Teenage Fortunes / April 30 2008
No.16
You will be arrested for receiving stolen goods. The arresting officer will ask you who it is that has a Saturday job in the electrical department of Woolworths that sold to you the expensive Sony radio cassette player for £5. You will refuse to ever tell him. The arresting officer will grab you by your tender teenage neck and threaten to throw you down the concrete steps leading to the police station cells unless you give him the name of the person that has a Saturday job in Woolworths from whom you bought the expensive Sony radio cassette player for £5. You will say this: ‘It was Clive Harper, sir. Clive Harper.’
Filed under Teenagers / Telling Teenage Fortunes
Comments
8 comments on “Telling Teenage Fortunes”
David / April 30th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Woolworths don’t sell expensive Sony radio cassette players.
Napoleon Fantastic / April 30th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Ah, David, they did back then. Seemed like quality goods at the time, anyway.
Nelson Galaxy / April 30th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Is Clive Harper still in the stolen electrical goods trade? I need a cheap DVD player and DSLR camera, could you have a word and see what he can do?
Nelson Galaxy / April 30th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Not that I’m condoning crime, obviously. Stealing = bad. If I ever catch that b*****d who stole my sandwich out of the fridge. . . why I auda.
Napoleon Fantastic / May 1st, 2008 at 11:57 am
Nelson,
Have you been taking drugs again?
Nelson Galaxy / May 1st, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Yes, the drug of life 
Graham Boffey / May 3rd, 2008 at 2:41 pm
T’would seem that your brush with the law was as successful as mine. I remember when I was questioned, I refused to give a statement until I was persuaded to tell the arresting officer everything by him convincing me that if he were to shove my head through the window, I would probably be the worse for the experience. Aaahhh, the British Bobby, noting finer and nothing more violent. What bastards!
Napoleon Fantastic / May 4th, 2008 at 11:44 am
Graham,
Yes, the good old British policeman: very fair but very bastards.
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