The Fly Who Came In From The Cold / January 28 2008
Every year, spring seems to arrive earlier and earlier. Daffodils are in early bloom in my garden and the wild rose bush is in tender bud. Generally, temperatures are above average for this time of year and for the past week or so, I have been thinking about having a cold beer much earlier in the evening than can be considered a respectable hour for a winter month.
What was most surprising, however, was that I found Audrey excitedly chasing a big fat bluebottle fly around the kitchen this morning. I have resolved to telephone Norris McWhirter - or one of his descendants – later today, because, as far as I am aware, such creatures are a feature of the summer months and for one to be bombing around the house at this time of year must surely be a record.
So delighted was I by this particular individual’s unexpected appearance that I found myself wracked with guilt and remorse as I sprayed its tiny body with army-strength insecticide.
The presence of flies in the house always presents me with something of a moral dilemma. I do not enjoy killing them, despatching them to the great dog turd in the sky, but neither can I abide having the annoying little blighters buzzing around my immediate surroundings. I always spend a few minutes trying to coax them out of a window or the back door, but for some reason, they seem to greatly prefer to explore the interior of the house and use all their considerable insect wit and resources to constantly evade my efforts in politely trying to get them to leave.
Little bastards.
Filed under Annoyances / Audrey / Climate change / English Weather / Global Warming
Comments
9 comments on “The Fly Who Came In From The Cold”
Nelson Galaxy / January 28th, 2008 at 11:06 pm
Kill ‘em. Or else they will get inside your hoover and lay eggs. Next thing you know is you have been invaded by The Vacuum Maggots. Aaaarrrrgggghhhhh….
Jo Beaufoix / January 29th, 2008 at 1:50 am
I’m with Nelson. If you can’t get them to leave, it is best to give them a helping hand. Bleurghhh.
Napoleon Fantastic / January 29th, 2008 at 11:28 am
I do not like to kill any of the Baby Jesus’s little creatures. If someone could convince me that flies are a creation of the Devil then maybe I’ll swat a couple just to keep you too murderous savages happy.
Charlotte / January 29th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
I’ve had the misfortune to swallow a large blue bottle. Not only that, I chewed it as well. Don’t ask. They taste like the Devil himself, so please kill all in sight! Yuk.
Napoleon Fantastic / January 29th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
Why would you swallow a large, blue bottle?
Were you drunk? You were, weren’t you?
I swallowed a moth once; it tasted of hope.
Charlotte / January 29th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
It wasn’t on purpose, but I admit I was a little tipsy. I was eating outside, and it landed on my bbq’d mushroom. I didn’t see it, and it was too sluggish to fly off as I ate the mushroom. Urrgggh, I’m shivering with disgust at the memory. I had to swill it down with a dozen glasses of wine. Hope is a much nicer taste.
xx
Napoleon Fantastic / January 29th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Ohhhh . . . blue bottle fly. Ha ha - I had visions of you swallowing a tiny blue bottle - glass bottle. Thought you’d been up to some of your weird party tricks again.
Stan used to love eating flies. Remember? Audrey tries to catch them but she’s not quite fast enough. Squirrels, no problem; flies, practice needed. 
Charlotte / January 30th, 2008 at 12:52 am
I do remember! Stan was a nutter!
My cuddly cat Frankie (’Fat Frank’) eats the ratty-like squirrels called ‘loire’ here in France. It’s quite a sight to see…not something for you….close your eyes Napoleon.
Napoleon Fantastic / January 30th, 2008 at 12:52 pm
Hehe. Audrey has caught one or two but then has no idea what to do with them. She looks at it, looks at me, looks at the squirrel . . . I think she just wants to play with them. She doesn’t harm them. Once they realise they are not going to be eaten alive, they dust themselves off and scamper away.
Leave a comment
