Morning Glory / January 31 2008
I slept so well last night, for the first time in ages.
I awoke feeling absolutely marvellous and leapt out of bed like a character in a mattress commercial. I had some difficulty putting on my trousers due to the spectacular case of morning glory I was experiencing – a prominence so uncharacteristically proud that I […]
That Anti-Midas Touch / January 30 2008
Nelson Galaxy has been writing on his blog about his adventures in pro-audio equipment annihilation while he was here at Christmas recording his album. He isn’t alone. In my experience, his unfortunate potential for localised destruction of expensive electronic apparatus is quite common.
I had to ban a young bass player called Joe who was inflicted […]
The Fly Who Came In From The Cold / January 28 2008
Every year, spring seems to arrive earlier and earlier. Daffodils are in early bloom in my garden and the wild rose bush is in tender bud. Generally, temperatures are above average for this time of year and for the past week or so, I have been thinking about having a cold beer much earlier in […]
Psych 101 / January 27 2008
This morning I encountered the scruffy old woman I often see pushing her little baby doll around the village in a broken pushchair. She did not have her constant companion with her on this occasion, and, hobbling along with her face to the ground, she seemed to be in some distress. As I drew closer, […]
While the Westerlies Sigh / January 26 2008
High winds here in England.
I have just been struggling with Audrey on the recreation ground, holding on to her lead for dear life and trying with all my might to prevent her from becoming airborne.
One of her friends, a little boy named Billy, had to use all his strength to make it over to us, […]
Blue Skies / January 25 2008
For some reason, everything seems brighter this morning.
I felt refreshed when I awoke, which is unusual for me – I mostly wake up feeling more tired than when I went to bed. My first cup of tea of the day tasted like hot nectar, as if it had been brewed by naked Japanese virgins, and […]
Our Manual Friend / January 24 2008
Sonny Starr, drummer with punk band The Dysons, turned up at the studio last night. In his arms was a bundle of technical manuals. ‘Here ya go,’ he said, cheerfully.
‘What are these, Sonny?’ I asked.
‘Reading books.’ Intelligence and literacy are not his defining characteristics.
I was going to ignore them initially, but propelled by some kind […]
The Convincer / January 22 2008
‘I really don’t need any new windows, thanks.’
‘I think you’ll find you do, Mr Fantastic.’
‘Look,’ I told him, ‘it’s a seductive paradox: I would love to stand and talk but I’m very busy. I would really appreciate it you could just go away.’
‘You see, these here at the front, they’re what we call “corroded” – […]
I See Dumb People / January 21 2008
As I was coming out of the Co-op today, I bumped into Reg, the aquatic troubleshooter, and I must say, my opinion of the fellow has changed.
After standing and chatting to him for a few minutes this morning, I realised that he is in fact a comedy genius.
He had noticed that I was becoming intensely […]
Stereo-untypical / January 19 2008
I had a cancellation in the studio for Saturday so I decided last night to put my feet up and get drunk.
I made myself a hearty meal of pasta and vegetables, placed a bottle of red wine on the table in front of me and turned on the television. I was watching an interesting documentary […]
