The Truth About Fleas / December 16 2006
I bloody hate the Red Hot Chilli Peppers.
Lately, I’ve been listening to XFM on the radio of a morning while I’m working out. The Chilli Peppers’ atrocious music is played at least twice every hour, much to my chagrin. (I tried switching to Virgin Radio but that was even worse.)
I really haven’t the slightest idea why people like them. I find their songs so unimaginative and, well, ordinary. The melody always follows the standard major chord changes, the lyrics are always parochial and dull, the sentiment in their songs is often dreary or impenetrable, and the performances of the band members are always very reliably unspectacular. I can find nothing special about them whatsoever; nothing that warrants the fact that they have such a large and devoted following.
It has been said many times before that I possess rather limited cerebral resources, I know. But I think I’m missing something quite fundamental here. If you know what it is, please enlighten me.
Filed under Bands / Music / Music Critisism / Napoleon Fantastic's Big Mouth
Comments
4 comments on “The Truth About Fleas”
Jo Beaufoix / December 20th, 2006 at 8:51 am
I think the problem with red hot chilli peppers is the rumour spread in the early 90s.
From then on, many, including a large proportion of the worlds pensioners and librarians, believed that if Red Hot Chilli Peppers did not get a good turn out for their musical extravaganzas(their words not mine), then real red hot chilli peppers (the vegetable type thing) would disappear from the face of the earth. Hence no more red hot chillis, spicy fajhitas and many other red hot phenomena, including perhaps even bunsen burners and the radiator.
Therefore, people continue to buy RHCP music to prevent the occurence of a modern day iceage, where we’d all be really unwell unless we lived inside mammoths.
Hope that helps.
Jo x
Napoleon Fantastic / December 20th, 2006 at 10:55 am
Hi, Jo.
Thanks for your help. I still don’t like them, though.
But could I live without spicy fajhitas? Probably not.
I presume this means we’re stuck with the buggers. Ho hum.
Nelson Galaxy / December 20th, 2006 at 6:02 pm
I will listen to any old s**t but rhcp’s are an abonimation - truely one of the earth’s worst disasters.
Punk funk - yeah - give me Gang of Four and Josef K any day.
Funk Rock - wrong wrong very wrong.
Kill the funkers.
P Diddy O / December 21st, 2006 at 3:38 pm
I too share your confusion, Mr. Fantastic.
Anaemic, monotonous white-boy funk played by 4 Muscle-bound tantric yoga enthusiasts (one of whom has the most punchable face in rock - can you guess which one?).
Also troubled by the way the guitarist looks like he’s shooting his load into his trousers whenever he plays a solo. The only thing I’d like to be shooting when I hear their music is them - squarely in their smug faces with a cannon - and maybe 2 bullets in the back of the head for Anthony f*****g Keidis. Harsh? Too right.
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